One Norwegian Alaskan in Madison.

Impending Doom...sday Hill


Talked with Rachel tonight. Realized that Bloomsday is in fact coming. Also realized that I am not at all ready for it. Or am I? She claims that Volunteer Park is 1.5 miles away, which would mean that I ran 3 miles today. Which was the longest I ran last year before the race, and I didn't die then...could it be that I might be on track without trying? That would kick would also mean I need to set some hard goals for the race. It can be either "run really really ridiculously fast" or "run all the way...even up Doomsday Hill, without stopping". Maybe next year it will be both.

Easter means I can sleep in!


I worked for five of the last seven days, went hiking up Little Si with my grandmother and her boyfriend one of the days, and bailed out on her for Easter on the seventh. Shamelessly used my unwitting roommate and her entire family as a foolproof excuse. Am summarily rerouted to Hell.

Earning money was delightful, if a bit monotonous. Ironically, I've now taught contact virgins to put their lenses in more times than I've put them in myself. And yet they continue to pay me. Here's where I state for the record that I refuse to be ungrateful for a job I did no work to get, that lets me work for an awesome doctor. At that point I will throw in the towel and declare myself spoiled. And then I will become a nun.

I was house/feline sitting for my aunt over break while she accompanied her v. British fellow to his motherland. Am proud to say that feline suffers from neither malnourishment nor neglect...too much. Her only recourse for punishing my extreme tardiness most nights was to perch on the foot of the bed the next morning and perform the feline version of Handel's "Messiah" approximately two hours before my alarm was set to go off.

I spent a few nights down at my apartment; on various evenings consumed movies and beer with a kindred spirit, rescued a roommate stranded in the U-district, and took visiting girls out to sushi. This was all made possible by the car my aunt lent me for the week. Have I mentioned how much ass I kick in a manual? Seattle hills have nothing on my brake-to-gas foot skills. Wet Seattle hills with an apparent 30% grade are pushing it (damn Boren), but they still got nothing. Give me an 18-gear behemoth with a split rear axel and I will have it under control in a week, I promise you.

I had the best of intentions to a) run a lot, and b) study o chem a lot this week. Did neither. I got back to my running shoes each night too tired (and lazy) to put them on. Same for the o chem. I basically picked up my o chem textbook, solution manual, and four binders full of notes/exams/evidence of my horrible study habits and let them languish in a new setting for a week. I thought they might like to get out a bit.

Today has rectified all that work-induced sloth, however. I got up in my own bed, ran to Volunteer Park, took care of bills, laundry, shopping, and books, and then went out to Thai with a lovely chica of mine. I even started scholarshipping and called my (previously ditched) grandmother! I don't know what's in the water here, but it's damn good. Got an email from my o chem professor this afternoon, with a 56 page attachment. Holy fuck. He has lost his mind. I now have in my hand the entire content of the next ten weeks. Were I male, my balls would have retreated upward by now. Instead, I'm left here to quake...and go study before class has even commenced. Damn you, Meany!

On a happy ending note, my mom called earlier this week to see what I might like in a surprise Easter gift box. This is amazing because a) my mother never calls me, and b) she never sends gift boxes. I now have an assortment of Clif bars, crosswords, pens, cranberry Kashi, and coffee. My heart is singing, and my stomach is growling. Clif bars are possibly the best breakfast a girl can look forward to...

almodovar knows his drama...


alcohol i s my best friend, and spanish movies too. vodka is possibly the best use of the potato, besides this. thank you, darling. you are one of my favorite catholics around. must sleep. have sinking feeling that tomorrow will be very late in coming. cheers.


This article about genetic differences between females and males on the BBC caught my eye during my latest bout of studying evasion. So cool! All the research that has led up to these blows my mind. This week I want to be a geneticist when I grow up...

English Genius
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The ides of March are come, but they are not gone...

The more you know...


Holy crap! I do believe I can now wiggle my ears independently of each other.

Also, my paper is still not finished.

#1 T-Shirt of the day:
"Once you go Asian, you never go Caucasian"

Also, my Judaism paper is not done. Shite.

Jacked from...well, Jack.


Layer One:
--Name: Sarah R. “Hulk Smash” Slauson
--Birthplace: Palmer, Alaska
--Current location: Seattle, WA

Layer Two:
--Eye color: Brown
--Hair color: Brown
--Height: 5'3"…and a half…
--Righty or lefty: Right handed and footed
--Zodic sign: Leo
--Heritage: Alaskan. It’s practically its own country, so why not?
--Shoes you wore today: Flip-flops. March is summer, right?
--Your weakness: brainy, confident guys, good food, duct tape (all tools, really)
--Your fears: apathy, never loving, failing to discover what I really want out of it all
--Your favorite kind of Pizza: homemade
--Goal you would like to achieve: Hike the PCT, get some higher-higher education, earn my pilot’s license

Layer Three:
--Your most over used phrase on AIM: sup?
--Your thoughts when you first wake up: "…unnnhhhh…again?…"
--Your bedtime: Whenever this Islam paper finishes itself off
--Your most missed memory: hiking around in Alaska

Layer Four:
--Pepsi or Coke?: H2O, baby
--McDonalds or Burger King?: *hurl*
--Single or Group date?: single, if at all
--Adidas or Nike?: nein
--Lipton or Nestea?: st. dalflour’s-
-Chocolate or Vanilla?: mexican chocolate, por favor
--Capuccino or coffee?: yes. please. now.

Layer Five:
--Smoke: hell no
--Cuss: constantly. The goal is to invent new words.
--Sing: horribly, mostly in the shower. I apologize to the soap often.
--Shower everyday: my favorite daily ritual
--Have a crush: mmhmm…many…
--like(d) High School: the latter half rocked my socks
--Want to get married: no time soon. next question
--Believe in yourself: yes. Sometimes when it’s not warranted.
--Get motion sickness: never. Just try me. And by that I mean let me pilot the fighter jet, pretty please?
--Think you are attractive: Sometimes. How good is your eyesight? Definitely to certain boys in Africa…
--Think you’re a health freak: within reason. corn chips are good.
--Get along with your parents: famously, now that I live thousands of miles away. We’re cool.
--Play an instrument: the recorder, baby. I was awake in 3rd grade ;-)

Layer Six:
-In the last month have you:
--drank alcohol: yes
--Smoked: no
--Done a drug: only caffeine
--Had sex: if only…
--Made out: are you taunting me?
--Gone on a date: no. now, stop asking me these questions.
--Eaten an entire box of oreos: ick, no.
--Broken any windows: why yes! It’s so much more fun when I make my own questions
--Been dumped: no
--Gone skating: no
--Made Homemade cookies: No
--Gone skinny dipping: No
--Dyed your hair: yes
--Stolen anything: yes

Layer Seven:
-Have you ever:
--Played a game that required you take off clothes: no
--In mixed company: no
--Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yes
--been caught "doing something": almost, but we were quick. And they were oddly cautious about opening the door…I wonder why?

Layer Eight:
--Age you hope to be married: 90
--Names and number of children: two or three - Valencia, Sumatra, Bloody--wait, you said oranges, right?
--Describe your dream wedding: hey, that would involve marriage…
--How do you want to die: just post-coitus
--Where do you want to go to college: Seattle University works for me
--What do you want to be when you grow up?: your mom. Or a mad, bad scientist.
--What country would you most likely visit: All of them. Really. Except the U.S. They’re crazy, I hear.

Layer Nine:
--Best eye color: vivid anything
--Best hair color: dark
--Short or long hair: not too short. ruffled hair is my favorite
--Best article of clothing: something easily removable
--Best date location: somewhere outside
--Best first kiss location: the side of the neck, somewhere by the ocean

Layer Ten:
--# of drugs taken illigally: 0
--# of people I would trust with my life: 1
--# of CDs you own: good question. “own”…maybe 5. “have”…maybe 300
--# of piercing: 2
--# of tatoos: none…yet.
--# of scars on my body: so many

Last person who:
--Fell asleep in your bed. Other than you: Martin? I can’t remember.
--Saw you cry: Nick
--Made you cry: the woman at the damn bank
--Spent the night at your house: Jack
--You shared a drink with: Jack
--You went to the movies with: Lauren
--Yelled at you: Rachel
--Sent you an e-mail: P.J.

Have you ever...
--said "I love you" to someone who was not a family member: almost.
--Been to New York: no
--Georgia: no
--California: yes
--Hawaii: yes
--Mexico: yes
--China: no
--Canada: yes
--Danced Naked: many, many times
--Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: yeah. You too? It's so rad!
--Stalked someone: yes

Pick one:
--Apples or Bannanas: oranges
--Blue or Red: Red
--Walmart or Kmart: hell no
--Math or English: math
--Radio or CD: mp3s
--Drawing or Painting: sketches
--High School or College: college

The final questions:
--last times you went out of state: December, Tijuana
--Things you like in a guy/girl: Confidence, being curious and brave enough to explore, being in touch with reality, intelligent about a crapload of things, and willing to put up with me. That last part is key.
--What book are you reading now: The Sparrow
--What is on your mouse pad: cordless optical, baby
--favorite board game: risk
--Favorite magazine: le stranger
--Favorite sound: my girls laughing
--Worst feeling in the world: a knife to the kidney. Or my last exam score in P Chem.
--Do you like scary or exciting rollercoasters: yes. Please take me to one now. Please. Now.
--How many rings before you answer: 2.58
--If you could have any job you wanted what would it be: linguist. Or a researcher. Or a pilot. Maybe an astronaut. Or a chef.
--What are you going to do when you finish this survey: check in on my Islam paper. Maybe it’s finished itself by now…



I just got mondo work hours lined up for spring break. In fact, I'm now working all but one day of the week. This would seem to be a poor way to let loose and enjoy the mental break, no?

"Why are you so happy, Sarah?", one might ask. "You hardly work at all during the quarter. Shouldn't you be gagging at all the looming hours you'll spend behind the damn desk?"

Au contraire! My job is like novacaine for the brain, and in the evening I'll have nothing to take home with me. Nothing! And my bank account will love me forever.

I rule with an iron fist...


Soo...I put my hand through a piece of glass yesterday. On my way down to the front door with my roomies I stopped to swat a fly on the lower landing. Except "swat" became "destroy", and "fly" became "the window". The fly was chillin and when my palm of death came to crush it, the fly went through the window. As did my hand. Hulk smash!


Just a few things from the morning's culling:
  1. The #1 song on the charts when I writhed my way into this world was Prince's "When Doves Cry". Damn. I was really hoping for Madonna's "Like a Virgin"...
  2. The Stop Fucking Him post. I wholeheartedly agree. Christ, women. I don't advocate using sex as a bargaining chip for other issues (if you're willing to barter sex for other things, you might as well barter it for cold, hard cash...), but when the issue is sex itself and the byproducts of it, make sure it's on your terms and nothing less.
  3. Hugs are my favorite greeting.



blogger is broken! so very, very heart is soon to follow.

Edit: apparently not broken, just amnesiac. still. not nice.

About me

  • Homebase Madison, Wisconsin
  • I was raised in Alaska, am the shortest person in my family, and I can wiggle my ears.
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